Strugglin'

That's what I'm doing. The last week of marathon training has been a total struggle, and I feel like a failure.

Exactly like I felt here. Defeated. Failing.

I have yet to be able to get my mileage over 45 miles for a week, and with only 9 weeks left until the marathon, that really, really worries me. I'm starting to think I'm just not cut out to run marathons. I'm also really starting to think that my goal of a BQ is just not possible. How the hell am I going to maintain a 8:12 pace or less if I can't even make it more than 12-13 miles at a time without wilting?

My longest run to date has been 15 miles. I missed my 18 miler due to the foot injury, and then this past weekend we only made it 13 miles before I threw in the towel (it was supposed to be 20-yikes). We were out of town in CT and it was mega hilly there, and it was super humid. I never felt like at any point in that run that I ever reached a 'groove' and the entire 2 hours felt like an enormous struggle. Also, it feels ultra pathetic that it took me over 2 hours to run 13 miles. A 9:23 pace should be easy. And at 13 miles I had to just stop. This all does not bode well for the actual marathon.

I'm thinking I'm feeling really defeated by this training program (Pfitzinger). It seems like no matter how hard I try, I can't ever consistently hit all the mileage/speed goals. My legs are constantly sore, and my average pace has slipped further every week. I don't really know what to do. I think a large part of this problem is training in the peak of the summer, when the heat and humidity are inescapable. Also, running more than 5 days a week seems to just kill me. Last week the plan called for 3 of those 5 days to be in the double digits, which meant for me there wasn't enough time for my body to recover in between for me to be able to successfully tackle the next one.

I'm not even sure what the point of all this is - if you are still reading, thank for listen to me bitch and moan. :) I think I'll try to read a few more blogs and get some inspiration back (like Kris's amazing mileage!).